2015 New Year, New Us

Every year people make New Year resolutions and sometimes the hectic aspect of life kicks in and we forget about those resolutions. This year my household is undergoing a transformation for the better. We are establishing new house rules to help minimize some household conflicts, we will embark on a healthier lifestyle (one step at a time), we are going to work on becoming debt-free, and we are going to learn to relax and enjoy the good times. 

One of my downfalls has always been stressing too much and I am going to slowly learn how to let go and let live! I have come to realization that the years are going by way to quickly and we have been missing out on some of the best years of our lives! 2015 will be our year!!!!

Sticky situations

Everyone knows that Steve and I have a blended family and when we first met we found out that each of us had a daughter named Madison. My family and I had always called mine Madi and his was Maddie.... Talk about a sticky situation. Well, over time we have come to a compromise to where our oldest is now Madi-Mae and our youngest daughter is Lizzy (we shortened her middle name). Well, in general conversation one day I learned that if Ethan would have been a girl his name was going to be McKenzie. That's not a big deal you say? Hmmmmm.... We have a McKenna! So, if E-Bug would have been a girl we would have 2 Madison's, a McKenna, and a McKenzie.... Wow my head would have been swimming. It's bad enough that when E-Bug gets in trouble I call him Kenzie (yes that is his middle name) and McKenna will come walking in the room and ask what she's done wrong lol (I know poor kids!!!!) 

So, yes having multiple kids named the same or very similar can be a very sticky situation. However, it could have been a lot worse!!!!

Healing by remembering

Losing a loved one is an extremely difficult experience especially when that dreaded date rolls around. 

Today is the 9 year anniversary of my older brothers death. I guess I was lucky in the grieving department in a way because 2 weeks after Andy died, we found out I was pregnant with McKenna so my pregnancy was a blessing in disguise for many reasons. Andy and I had become extremely close over the years and I literally worshipped the ground he walked on. I knew he wasn't perfect by any means, but that didn't stand in my way. I've never really known one of my brothers and my brother Robbie is autistic so I was always more of a big sister to him instead of a little sister.

Okay, I'm jumping a head a bit. Andy is my brother from my father, we didn't actually meet each other until I was 11. Well, it didn't take any time for us to bond and it was like we had been raised together all of our lives. He was the big brother I never had growing up and I was absolutely over joyed to finally know him. At 11 you never really look far enough into the future to think that something could happen, he'll I don't think you really realize something could happen until you're fully grown and you understand the concept of life. So, when I received the phone call 14 years later that my 25 year old big brother had been killed in a car wreck.... I was devastated to say the least. I refused to believe it, until I was forced to see him lying lifeless in that coffin. That's an imagine I have tried to forget for 9 years! 

My entire point here is that losing someone you love is horrendous and it changes you life drastically. Over time you learn how to accept the loss and how to live life without that person. However, you never truly heal.... Some pain always remains. What makes it easier is realizing that they would want you to have a full life and to carry on their memory. So, I have a picture of my brother hanging on my living room wall and sometimes one of the kids will ask me something about Uncle Andy.... That's when I get to share some of the most amazing memories of him with them. 

This mothers Christmas list

Normally it's difficult for me to tell people what I want for Christmas because I'm always worried about making sure the kiddos have what they want. So, I asked my husband to send me a text of his Christmas/Birthday wants and boy was I surprised when I seen that the list was roughly about $2,000.00 lol. I was thinking to myself "wow that's going to be a Christmas/Birthday/Anniversary/Fathers day/ 2015 Christmas list!!!  Well, then that leads to the 'send me yours' and I'm ashamed to say I came up with 3 gift ideas.... Yes only 3!!! And the winners of the worlds most pitiful Christmas list are:

Failed plans

Sometimes I get overly excited when I find out we have the opportunity to make plans, whether it be a trip to the coast where my family is or just having 1 or 2 of the kids home for the weekend. Unfortunately, with six kids and a log hauler our plans tend to fall through due to some unforeseen event and I become very disappointed. I am slowly learning that these things just happen and I should leave my enthusiasm on the back burner until the telling moment arrives.

Lessons learned

I have learned to pick my battles with my kids. If my youngest (John) wants to wear a different pair of socks and it's between him throwing a tantrum or just changing his socks.... Guess who's wearing a different pair! In all honesty John tends to be the one I butt heads with the most because he's five, he's the baby, and well he believes he's entitled to everything lol! The biggest two lessons I have learned are: 1) if someone offers to take any of the kids for the night.... LET THEM!

2) each child is different and experiences and consequences should vary depending upon each child. I typically hear "but that's not fair" at least 10 times a day.... And of course what's my response?!?!? That's right.... "Well life isn't always fair!!"